bondsofsuffering | limelight

What?

[ a slow breath out ]

When he looked at me like a stranger? When he said he didn't care about me? That wasn't great, but I knew it wouldn't last. It was just some stupid thing from a booth. A couple of days, tops, and he'd be back to normal.

But like...Ore's the only person I've met from before I lost my memories. And maybe that's why. How bad would it be to deal with someone not recognizing you if you know it can't be fixed, you know? Who'd even want that?

...Then, you think the people who knew you might have decided it would be too difficult to face you, knowing you wouldn't - couldn't recognize them?

Wouldn't you?

I can't even blame them, if that was part of it.

...

No. I think I'll still blame them, even if that's the case.

Leaving you to be lost on your own, without anyone to support you... isn't that just taking the cowardly route?

[ a little laugh, rueful, and he fully slumps against snow. lets him hold up his weight for a moment ]

Maybe. You might have to blame them for both of us, whoever they are. Not that I really care about finding out anymore. Just...hard not to think about, after that.

[Snow accepts that weight, hugging him tighter.]

Fine, then I'll do all the blaming. They weren't there for you when you needed it most.

...If either of you lose your memories, I won't run.

I'll be there to love you, again and again.

[ squeezes his eyes shut, a lump rising in his throat ]

I wouldn't leave you either. I love you.

No way I'm letting go of you so easily.

Maybe I should make an adjustment to that necklace of yours. "If lost, return to Snowdrop with Acidia."

[ laughs, slight, reaches up with one hand to pull it out from under his shirt ]

I'd say there's not a lot of places to get lost around here, but this is a pretty big ship.

We have had people still manage to get lost, sooo...

Good point.

I'd always come back to you, though.

Is that a promise?

[ pulls back enough to kiss his forehead ]

That's a promise. Even if it means I'm bleeding on you for the, uh, hypothetical tenth time by then.

...Please try to avoid it, buuut I won't get mad if it happens again.

[But returning the kiss - albeit on the lips this time.]

Man, I keep trying.

[ not without humor. but more than happy to return the kiss. that one, with humor. the second one, more subdued. the third is all the unease and hurt he'd kept under the surface from satin and hyacinth, hesitates to admit even now ]

[He meets Aster each and every time, though he does note the lesser enthusiasm by the third.

With a hum, he draws back - pulls a bracelet out of his pocket.]

...Would you humor me for a moment and try this on?

[It's one of the emotion-share ones he'd received in exchange for flowers.]

[ pauses. looks at the bracelet. looks at snow.

yeah, sure, puts it on ]

What's it do?

[He'll feel an immediate thrum of affection and care, which should at least half-answer that.]

Two-way empathy bond. It's one of Dixie's rewards.

Of course it is.

[ a flicker of embarrassment, immediate. a lot of affection and gratitude. but also lingering disquiet and hurt, echoes of fear and even more anger. all buffered by a sense of safety in this moment, being around snow. ]

[He continues to hold Aster close, still idly petting his hair in that same comforting manner. There's a certain, subdued curiosity, tempered as it is knowing the kinds of things that no doubt led to the emotions he's feeling from Aster.]

That anger... is it constant?

[ a swell of reflexive shame ]

...since the Dame's performance. Yeah.

[That sense of comforting is in full force, concerned for Aster above all else, feelings be damned.]

...I can understand why.

I never used to get mad about much of anything?

[ a flicker-flash of surprise, appreciation ]

But these performances have been getting to me. These producers. The Showmaster. I hate them. I hate everyone doing this to us. It makes me want to...

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