bondsofsuffering | Imeeji IC Contact;

[Fairly quickly:]

Go to another world with Chrysanthemum. Whether or not we'll need treatment kind of depends on some other factors, but it's a possibility.

How much do you trust Chrysanthemum?

...Enough.

You'll have to forgive the prying, but one of your worries it that you would be abandoned in the end.

So I will ask again, how much do you trust him?

[Wow, his heart is such a traitor :/

His gaze slides to the ground. Because it's true; it's hard to trust, even - sometimes, especially - Chrys.]

I know he's still keeping things secret. I don't know if he'll ever tell me them, even if I do get all my memories back.

But... for some reason, I just know... he thought about me, even just a little, before he died. Maybe it's stupid. Maybe I'll end up regretting it. But... I want to be able to trust him this time.

It's the least I could do when I never tried believing in him back home.

I am glad you have that. A chance and faith to put into someone else. Though I would speak to him of it if he is receptive. It might help cement if the decision the right one.

I told you heart and Yvette that I don't necessarily need to be you confidant, just that you have someone to talk to and lean on.

And I know the knowledge I have is personal and truthfully I should not be privy to it. So if at a time you do not wish for me to have it, I can ask BARiTONES to remove it.

Mm, there's some things at least that should probably be kept quiet, but... I don't think you'd especially gain much from that information in particular.

That is to say, I think Yvette would also appreciate it if you didn't talk to just anyone about me being a devil. It caused a lot of problems, and some of them directly impacted her since she was with Chrys all the time.

Trust me, I know how judgmental people are. I do not plan on sharing what I learned with anyone else. Not to mention a horrible way to build trust asides if I did.

You have a least a plan. Honestly, I'm glad you are taking whom you care about to a different star. Your owe your current one little.

Truthfully, based on some of the stuff I remembered about Kiyotaka recently, the further away we can get from him, the better.

There's probably no escaping him on our world, so going to a different one's probably the safest bet.

Delightful. Now, doesn't it feel as if once you have that in place, the hardest step is complete? He has agreed to join you, correct?

...He was the one who proposed it in the first place. So when I brought it up again, he agreed pretty quickly.

There was some reason he left me in our world. Even with all the memories I've bought back, I still haven't found it yet. Something made him decide that instead of trying to find a solution to our problem together, the only option was to leave.

Knowing that, but not the reason - it's made it hard to trust that whatever happened is just okay now.

Then I suggest you save up points for the both of you. That should be discovered before you either of you graduate.

...

Yeah. I have plenty of points already for my own, but the last few I've gotten were rough, so...

At least you know when to take a break.

But for good or for ill those memories are a part of you. You can cast off what you once were if you so decide, but they belong to you.

[He gives a soft laugh, but it isn't particularly happy.]

...I know. But seeing all that...

Well, that's why I decided I'd just return home in the first place.

What did you see?

Do you know what happens in our world, when something or someone tries to kill Chrys or me?

No, but I am waiting to hear the horrific details. Do go on.

...

In our world, Chrys is the only person who can kill me, and there isn't anyone who should be able to kill him. No matter how unlikely it was, somehow, we'd survive, even if it took a miracle.

The last memory I took, I remembered waking up in a hospital. I'd tried so, so many times to die, but I kept surviving no mattered what I did. So... I even gave up on giving up. The only thing left for me was to wait to see what would come first: Chrys killing me, or my body deteriorating until there was no way for me to continue living.

Even though I had all these big dreams, I'd become someone truly pathetic. I didn't see any reason to try to salvage that. There was nothing worth saving.

Do not be hard on yourself for those moments. No one is made to bear burdens alone.

You are no long bereft of opportunity, but your illness does pose a challenge. Could one of you wish for both of your healing and the other a new star?

One of my unitmates promised to handle it with his wish, actually. He... wants to make sure I can do whatever makes me happy after this, and he was planning to take the hell graduation anyway, so he decided to use his wish on me - on us.

If that really does go through... we'll be free to take the heaven graduation and go wherever we want.

[The words are halting; he's still not even sure if he can completely believe in it, and it reflects in his voice. But he's trying to be even a little optimistic for once.]

Truly? Which one was that. I'd like to shake their hand at such a kind gesture.

You seem hesitant.

Levi. SensitIV's own most honorable member.

[For better and for worse.]

Historically things don't tend to just work out conveniently for me like that.

I have no doubts that your road to the life you wish to live will be fraught with difficulty. But you are taking the first step, and taking it with an ally and friend besides.

Whatever happens, I do believe whatever this path leads is far better than the one you are leaving behind.

...Here's hoping, at least.

[Hoping is so, so hard. But maybe this time...]

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